In Japan, so-called "proxy konkatsu" — in which parents search for spouses on behalf of their children — is spreading rapidly. As more young people delay or give up on dating and marriage, the sight of parents attending matchmaking sessions to scout partners for their children has become increasingly common.
According to the Nihon Keizai Shimbun (Nikkei) on the 7th, gatherings where parents introduce their children's personal details and occupations to find them marriage partners are flourishing in Japan. Konkatsu is a Japanese term for actively seeking a marriage partner, much like job hunting.
The 'Parents' Association for Good Matches,' one of the leading organizations, has held more than 750 events since its launch in 2005. Participation has grown more than 20-fold, from about 110 people in its first year to 2,334 last year. An event held in Tokyo last month drew a large crowd of parents with unmarried children aged 25 to 49, who gathered to introduce children from a range of professions, including doctors, university professors and corporate executives.
At the events, parents carry profiles containing their children's photos, occupations, education, height and certifications, exchanging information with one another. If both sets of parents express interest, the children then take over and pursue actual meetings. The participation fee is about 16,000 yen (approximately 150,000 won) per session.
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Analysts link the phenomenon to Japan's serious trend of late marriage and non-marriage. According to a national census by Japan's Ministry of Internal Affairs and Communications, the "lifetime unmarried rate" — the share of people who have never married by age 50 — stood at 28.3% for men and 17.8% for women as of 2020. Compared with 20 years earlier, the rate rose 15.7 percentage points for men and 12 percentage points for women.
Experts point to a social climate that has made workplace romance difficult and an environment with fewer opportunities to meet people as key causes. Mie Kito, a professor of social psychology at Meiji Gakuin University, analyzed that heightened awareness of workplace harassment and conflicts of interest has reduced opportunities for relationships to develop naturally at companies or schools. While new avenues for meeting people, such as matching apps, have multiplied, many young people fail to find an approach that suits them, prompting parents to step in themselves, she explained.
An official at a matchmaking agency also said that as the culture of acquaintances introducing potential spouses has disappeared, parental encouragement is increasingly becoming the starting point for konkatsu. In fact, in a survey conducted by konkatsu service provider Braizsi, 48.3% of parents with unmarried children aged 30 or older said they were worried about their children's marriage prospects.
CNN also spotlighted the phenomenon. The U.S. broadcaster reported that as rising living costs, economic uncertainty and changing workplace culture leave fewer Japanese wanting marriage and children, parents hoping for grandchildren are taking action themselves. It introduced a couple in their 80s who joined an event after seeing it in a newspaper because their 49-year-old son was too consumed by work to date.
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Still, proxy konkatsu does not always lead to success. The actual marriage rate is known to be around 10%. However, organizers explained that the true success rate may be higher, as parents often do not report back even when matches lead to marriage.
Yuki Ishikawa, a journalist who experienced proxy konkatsu for her eldest son, pointed out that unlike ordinary matchmaking, parents often evaluate factors such as family composition and home environment. Since a candidate's personality and charm are difficult to fully convey at such events, she said parents need to present their children objectively.
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